Since no one will probably be reading this let me make it short and sweet. Also it's not good to talk to yourself, never mind me writing to myself. I have been thinking of starting my own blog for awhile now. It always looks like so much fun when I read other blogs. I tried asking my sisters to write one with me, since they have all the kids and hence some great stories. All I got was a shrug of the shoulders and "hmmm". I figure I might as well start one and when they see how much fun it is and how "no body's gonna read it anyway", they will want to jump on board. I can see it will be very cathartic. Well I am the lonely middle sister not married and surprisingly the one who should have a "life", but sadly does not. I have 3sisters, two older and one younger. I know that means there's four of us, not really room for a "middle" sister. But my oldest sister is 7 years older than I so for most of my life that I can remember, she has been "grownup" and on her own. Which leaves 3 of us and me smack in the middle! See how that works...
I picked this blog title because that is my one big hope right now, Psalm 30:5 ...weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.
I have broken up with a boyfriend, lost my great Aunt and my Papa (Grandfather) all in the last 2 months. It has been so hard emotionally. With the death of my Papa, it's not just the loss of a man, but the loss of things never being the same again. I really hate change. I get a knot in my stomach when things change.
I grew up going to Papa's on Sunday afternoons. Plates of pasta, "auntie's chicken", salad, ham, green beans, stuffed artichokes and lots of Italian bread. We would eat in shifts cause there just wasn't enough room. First the kids ate, and depending on who all showed up there could be two shifts for the kids. Then the "grownups" started taking their turns. You just had to wait till there was an empty seat. And just when you found one, someone would call, "I'm sitting there!" As we ate, more Aunts and Uncles and cousins would arrive with some kind of food or dessert. All along the table you could here snatches of four or five conversations going on at the same time. Oh and God forbid that someone next to you got into a conversation with the other end of the table. Let me say it gets loud quickly. If it was a nice day then after lunch we all would head outside. A ring of folding chairs on the front lawn, for the "Aunties" and anyone else that needed to sit and relax while the food digested! Out back there would be a game of horseshoes going on. While the kids played ball and ran around, getting yelled at to "watch out" and "don't throw the ball over here!" Good times, good times! I'm so thankful for all these memories. Christmas won't ever be the same again, but I know now how I want the family I'll (hopefully) have one day to be.
I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God is GOOD, and God is in control. That is what helps me through dark days when all I can see is what I don't have or what could have been. I know that Joy will come in the morning, and sometimes it's morning in the middle of the night. It's whenever I turn my eyes back onto Jesus, and look away from the world and whatever else the enemy is holding in front of me to taunt me. I can hardly wait until that great day when Jesus comes to take us home where it will always be a bright new day, full of Joy!
Well ok so this didn't end up short and sweet after all, but it was cathartic!
Hopefully I will be able to post some photos and who knows maybe I can drag my sisters in here to.
6 comments:
April,
You made me cry. It really was just like you said. I can almost smell the sauce cooking on the stove and hear the chatter of voices. You are my Joy. I love you,
Jen
This is soooo cool! Welcome to blog-dom. I love how you said morning could be in the middle of the night. That is so how it is with Jesus! He is the best bride groom going and brings the eternal joy. You are linked on my blog as well. Check it out.
Love this and YOU my friend!
Don't forget that you are not just a daughter, sister, friend, aunt, etc...you are also a woman! A beautiful woman that God created on purpose for a specific reason. Joy does come in the morning - just like the sunrise: not in a flash of sudden light but slowly rising in intensity and splendor until at last the fullness of light can be seen over the horizon and then up into the sky. Trust the Lord, he if faithful. In Hebrews it says that Abraham was willing to give up Isaac because he knew "the One who promised is faithful." Even though it seemed that God was destroying his dream and not keeping his promise to Abraham, Abraham trusted in spite of the circumstances because he knew the character of God and knew that if God promised it, it would happen. Joy will come in the morning - that is our promise. I love you! I'm so glad you started this blog!!
Thanks you guy's. That so made my day! Thanks Katherine, that was so nice what you said, how you said it! You should have a blog! :) I'll be rereading it to soak it all in!
Thanks April for the invite into your world and how God has been working lately. I appreciate your openness and the reminders that we have a faithful comforter who will never leave us and who will always be the same. Love you April and thanks for inviting me to church. You have been instrumental in my own healing process.
Wow thanks Shelley, that means so much to me, I'm so glad we are friends. Thank you for being so supportive of me, you have been an encouragment to me!
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